I'm looking for anyone that may be able to guide me toward the help I believe I need. That is to say soul retrieval in particular. My story is long and I am more than happy to tell you what I know but for now. I'd like to keep this fairly short. I've lived through severe long term abuse of every type but through that also had an incredibile journey through spirituality. Through the abuse I feel that much of the person I was has been ripped from me to the very core. Dreams, visions, healing touch and so much more seems blocked. I wonder if anyone here has gone through such things or if anyone is willing to share paths they think might help. This missing part of me is truly more than I can bear and leaves me at times feeling that there is no point for my existence.

So, I am here asking for help. I am not a stupid woman just, I think lost and separated from that which is so very important to me and me feeling whole.

Love Light and Blessings to All

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Been where you describe!

One problem with someone else fixing you for free or charge, is the indebtedness incurred   As a process of the victim triangle is formed> from Victim there is the perceived Rescuer that can not maintain the Rescuer status anymore and then appears to fall into the Abuser role

I suggest http://www.amazon.com/Spirit-Releasement-Therapy-Technique-Manual/d...

The  Spirit Releasement Therapy: A Technique Manual by William J. Baldwin

Baldwin, thanks for your reply. I wonder though if this wouldn't depend on those involved? When I was able I never looked for compensation for what I was able to do, I found that just the ability to help another being was more than enough. Psychologically I guess these things can happen to less enlightened or more narrow minded people. I just don't know that, having been two of the three above that in the end one would look at me and see or feel that I am an abuser or in that role in any way whether I failed or didn't. I will look up your site but as money for me right now is beyond my reach I don't know that I will be able to follow through on the therapy you offer.

Thank you.


I think some of this book can be found on line a few pages at a time...   It or the book helped me to explain some things I witnessed, sort of a bunch of ah ha moments! or that makes sense as the pieces started to make more sense 

With relationships and them failing!  Both parties sort of need to decide the other was wrong or a bad person before a separation and we do not do what we were doing any more...  Sort of One might need to tell (Self) others how bad a person is before they can publicly justify a separation, and declare them a bad person formally out loud and to others

People just do not understand a divorce or separation just because paths diverge,  and one decides they love the night life and shopping till they drop daily and need to spend every penny to feel alive, and a person who wants to live a quiet non dramatic spiritual life seeking enlightenment 

So these people need to declare how hideous life was with them and focus on this daily to justify their actions to self and others!  So they do not have to consider they are less than perfect and could have been wrong about how or why someone else did what they did

But the book I referenced was the most complete reference to this, I had yet found when I posted this

When I started going through my awakening I was reintegrated and fragmented peices of myself returned to me. The reintergration was totally natural of the shifting of myself, and could feel parts of myself that had been long missing. I would say that not one thing has been the end all be all of my awakening or my healing, but it has been many things that make up the whole. being able to feel the walled off parts of myself felt great. Abuse fragments people, but we can heal beautifully and wonderfully. It is again the many parts that make up the whole......one thing leads to the other.

There are lots of things you can do. Is there a shaman you can work with? A book? A shaman journey meetup group? If there is not a meetup group then maybe create your own? Meditation is a free tool that you can use and you can employ it anywhere and it heals people (that is the best part) I am a huge fan of yoga and find it to be very very healing in both mind body and spirit. I have done tons of yoga in he last year.......

I hope this was helpful!!

There are 'reserves' a couple hours away but for a stranger to go looking for that type of thing is difficult and usually unacceptable unless I'm able to find one of the elders that still values the old ways, the gift of tobacco is easy but will they understand if I tell them when I look at myself its like looking at a shattered mirror at the bottom of a lake some of the pieces are covered in mud and others pieces just lay way down on the bottom still shining but shattered none the less.

And then the other issue is being disabled, crippled from the waist down 8 years ago with all the wonderful things that go with half a body that doesn't work it makes it very hard to see any worth when I do look in the mirror. 

Thank you for sharing this me, can't begin to tell you what it means. I wrote a reply to Walks above, maybe you could take a look and in some way relate to the shattered mirror that is myself, my soul, that is shattered sitting at the bottom of the lake. I can see the pieces but can't reach them or even begin to know how to put them back together in a way that brings that "special" part of me back to where I can continue to give and not drain from others. This lost feeling has been going on a long time and I truly don't know where to begin to fix it. There is however, a store in town that deals in crystals and healing stones, I will be sure to search out the ones you've written down.

I am truly happy that I could be a part of your awakening of your bit of soul but do believe that you would have done that in your own way in time anyway. You, wherever you may be have "touched" my soul as well. I do feel that I have so far to go that I might not ever find those parts of myself that mean so much, ever again.

I like the idea that they can be fixed, I can be fixed, but where and how is beyond any comprehension I have at this time.

I truly hope that we might talk again. Thank you.

Matuk Oyasin


Your words honor me, truly. I will do as you say because I find truth in it and I hope that we can continue to talk for a long time to come. I "feel" some small part of what has been lost in your words and can't tell you what that means to me either. Its been a long time since I've had the prescence of mind to attempt to meditate, medications, depression, disability, multiply diagnoses of many doctors who can't see that each person is thier own diagnosis in that every person on the planet feels, copes, deals, and the list goes on in their own uniques way so while yes there are some symptoms that "lump" people together there is so much more that makes each unique and until modern medicine figures that out I have my doubts as to whether they will ever truly be able to "heal" anyone. You though, people like you are so far and few between, humanity needs more like you. I know that you have helped me begin a new path on my journey, my hope is that it brings me back to be the healer and not the one that feels lacking in so many ways. thank you and may your days nights and life be truly blessed.

You have your heart and mind pointed in the right direction. The direction of healing. Trust that it will be done.....It is hard sometimes when you are feeling like you are sinking into the swamp of sadness, but one inch at a time we climb our way back out of the dark, hell or whatever else we are struggling with.

With lack of funds getting creative, even if it is only at first small steps to shift energy. Small movements forward, small shifts in energy add up to big ones. Meditation is free and can be done anywhere. Having access to the Internet is good, youtubes are great and have everything from guided meditations (which are very powerful) to documentaries, inspirational videos and there are soul retrieval videos....It might sound silly but what I am saying is the shifting and moving of energy.

Is there a shaman meetup group you can join? Just an idea...there are lots of meetup groups for all kinds of people, some are social and others are groups(some charge).

Moving the energy little by little, until one day your in the sun smiling ear to ear.

Maybe pray at night before bed about this being reintegrated.

This would be nice as I have truly forgotten what that feeling is like and can't honestly say I remember the last time I smiled anything more than for someone else's comfort. Prayer has been fairly consistent but self-belief difficult as has meditation. Small steps to shift my energy might be a really good way for "me" to start. Thank you.

Have you read Robert Moss. He talks about soul retrival and how to do it and how you can do it and I believe I did a bit of it myself. He has several books on dreaming that may help. He recommends you do it yourself but with a circle of people helping you.


Sorry i have not read Robert Moss but i do know the path to soul retrieval through the teaching of my Master Dr. Amit Jain. If you want you may also join in the following website: www.thepathwaytoselfmastery.com and you may also join me as a friend & join the World Peace Ring group for further information.

I am more than likely a distant cousin to Robert Moss according to some of my family members, that have spoken about this matter, of the Moss and Maughs lineage, so I will get some of his literature on my to read list for the next year as a to do thing!

But please note I see all healing modalities and religion that is not too ego centric, as the same!, The only difference I witnessed was the order and magnitude and direction the paths take to get the job done!


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