In fact, unless you have the compassion, empathy, heart and mind of a saint, as the site grows I can pretty much guarantee it.

There will be those people here. Those people you try so desperately to avoid. Those people that grate on your nerves. Those people that believe in *that* stuff, you know, maybe it's the scary stuff, or maybe it's fluffy bunny stuff. Maybe it's not what they believe, but how they shove it down your throat. Or so it seems. Or maybe it's that they just seem to know it all, and they're SO wrong. You know THOSE people.

Well guess what, we're all one of those people. All of us come off the wrong way to someone sometime. Yeah, we might whine in our heads, but we know better. I'm really a NICE person, a SMART person, a RIGHT person. My intentions are all in the right place. Well guess what, we're all one of those people too.

Ayup.

There will be people here that will use words you don't like, and find offensive.

There will be people here that have beliefs and practices, that you find disturbing, upsetting, or maybe silly, stupid, or trivial. All of us, will have SOME negative assumptions about someone on this site.

Bottom line, we are all who we are.

If we want the freedom to be ourselves, we must extend that freedom to others.

If we want to be respected for our own choices, faiths, ideas, beliefs, we have to extend it to others.

What then to do with those individuals that rub many people the wrong way? Who are more extreme on the edge of a more out there belief, or method of expressing themselves that they disrupt a lot of people a lot of the time. I'm not sure honestly how I will deal with individuals that may really push this sites members buttons.

My first line of approach is trying to work toward an inclusive solution. Bring resolution and positive change without excluding someone. I would like to make removing someone from this site a really last resort.

There are people who thrive on conflict, and conflict is also often a positive part of people who are going through periods of growth and change. Overcoming conflicts. Learning how to resolve conflict. As well as learning how to communicate with others effectively and to co-operate with others, is one of the most meaningful things we can do actually in terms of our self growth and development.

You can use conflict with others on this site as catalysts for positive growth and change, for yourself, and for others. You can choose to try to change what you can change, not that other person, but yourself. You can choose to try to expand your empathy and compassion. You can make an effort to try harder to understand why that other person is who they are, believes what they believe, and feels how they feel, or expresses themselves how they do. All of us have baggage, history, triggers, brainwashing, etc, to overcome. All of us. We are all the walking wounded. If you want a less judgemental more compassionate world. WE have to co-create it.

We can start co-creating it here.

Defuse conflict, keep conflict to places where people who want to embrace it only can, and not impose our conflict onto others who do not want to be a part of it. Recognize trolling behaviours and people who feed on negative energy, or are addicted, literally to the adrenaline rush of the 'fight' or flight response, and just like a good fight (yup, some do, let them fight with others that like to do battle, and if your the pacifist type like me, learn to walk away). I have a tendency as a pacifist to want to repress or smooth over conflict, perhaps more than is ultimately healthy. Really, who gets to decide? and maybe what is healthy for one person isn't the same for another...

I know you're all intelligent enough to really get what I'm saying here.

Conflict will happen, be ready for it, focus not on what I can do as a site owner to fix it for you, or what the other person has to do to stop bothering you, and focus on the only change that really matters, the one you can bring with you off site and everywhere you go. Learn your own personal way of dealing with it, create strategies and plans for self for sharing spiritual space with a diverse group of people.

This place will have a lot of freedom, for many people, that may feel like a lack of 'security', that lack of security, is not coming from the site, that feeling of insecurity, is a feeling, and it comes from within you, and only you, can address it. You can avoid it, or you can understand it, and control it, rather than letting it control you.

Leila

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Word

Wow, that's quite the disclaimer.

That's an interesting perspective, Tommy.  Who do you think brought the human race here, and why?  The Annunaki?  Just interested, as we all have our theories about our origins and how that forms our perspectives and opinions.

My perspective is that the the universe operates within a perpetual grand cycle, within which smaller cycles operate and so on,  from the macrocosm to the microcosm.  Some of the cycles that directly effect planet Earth we refer to as Aeons, Epochs, or Ages, like Kali Yuga, the procession of the Equinoxes, and the Golden Age.  I believe, for example, that we are on the cusp of the Age of Aquarius as well as The Golden Age of 10,000 years proceeding from the Dark Age just passing, but not yet passed. 

The Age of Aquarius for me has to do with revolution and the power of individuality; it is the realisation that we don't need leaders, because we are all the leaders we need as we realise our own power.  It's my opinion that, within this new aeon, change has to come from the grass roots, not from patronising us from above in the form of spiritual or political leaders because the age of sheep is passing, and what some people withstood even 20 years ago they will not stand for now.  As more and more people awaken to the idea that governments have been corrupted by bankers and corporatocacy, the more people will look for alternatives to government, like self government and a return to smaller scale social management.

 

I think there is always a 'place' for such appointed leaders on a bigger scale, rather than organically arising visionaries and spokespeople within their own communities, but they will not take such a prominent place as they once did, simply because the chief reasons for their existence was in their messages and the sheer volume of people willing to listen to them.  Well now there are many many more voices all singing a similar melody,  even without having ever heard these people, because it is in our DNA.   Their messages have cross pollinated through the ethers and in cyberspace and we are now in the position to discover 'the truth', whatever form that may be in for us on our journeys, for ourselves.  Plenty of world leaders and visionaries have been executed over the years, and we're grateful they played their part as they form many of the references of today, but that is not the way any more, I feel.  That era was yesterday.

We remain within a perpetual game of tag with ourselves as we choose which reality to focus on.  The world 'out there' with all of it's drama, and the world 'in here' with all of it's bliss, if we allow it.  How to reconcile and get the best out of our lives here means we somehow have to learn how to reconcile the negative and positive and spin it the way we want, but because we are all here for different reasons, what matters to one person may not matter much to the next, and that is something we are all faced with at some point in our lives, whether we feel we have a monopoly on 'the truth' or not. 

Nicely put, Leila.  I look forward to learning from others and sharing with others as well.  

We can learn so much from each other, and tolerance and respect cost nothing. It's good manners. Well said, Leila!

I know there are a lot of haters and non believers. it takes all kinds to make up a world. I don't pay attention to them. Thanks for the heads up.

i understand thank you i seek to learn

That's kind of a vague complaint. What do you mean by "arbitrary, and often biased decision making" do you have an example of that? I'm sincerely curious not trying to be an asshat, I just really don't know what you are talking about.

Oddly, I don't see them making assumptions about members here or going around calling other people names, and yet you are. That is sort of contrary to you truly driving your point home. I mean, your assumption seems to be that they are all "petty egotists" but your the one name calling, isn't name calling sort of petty? 

Not all "'mods' , 'admins', etc." are the same any more than every single member here is the same. I would suggest that if you have an issue with a specific person you bring it up with them, you'd be surprised how communicative people can be when approached in a mature manner. A very important part of conflict resolution is communication, not calling out an entire grouping of people in a public forum and calling them names and making assumptive accusations about all of them that couldn't possibly be true.

Ditto.... what Nyx said.

Hola!

new here

i jumped to forum and saw this first

now i am scared!

just kidding ofc  :)

well, thanks for the well structured and objective advice, i appreciate it.

I think one of our interesting challenges as persons is to integrate us with others, most if they seem too different to us

we have something to learn from them... its somehow mmmhhh...  raw reflexes,

something that is telling us few misteries  about ourselves,

is part of the whole package when we arrived here to earth, its salt and pepper of this life.

i believe its our zen state who can determine how we will react when facing these chalenges,

also i see them as opportunity to grow and test the stillness in times of internal and external conflict.

changing a bit topic i am curious about the gap from 2013 to 2015 where there are not comments here.

It is intriguing at least for me.

Exploring the site and learning how to move.

Hola to all.

Lauz Tosh

The gap represents a period of time when this post was buried in the back pages, there are over 1,000 discussions here, that's over 100 pages. It was originally posted in 2011 then went dormant for awhile before it was brought back into the light...

Everyone's experience here is different and generally is what they make of it. The experience is a choice.

Welcome to the Temple, here's hoping your experience here is a good one!!!

But my friend who better to sharpen your blade

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